Love is All, Love is Everyone
From the time we are young, we are told by just about everyone that, until we find the 'right' person to share our life with, we will never be complete and happy. Even popular music reinforces this notion that, until we find true love, we are nothing but insignificant masses floating through space. Many people actually believe this fairytale version of love, and end up with constant feelings of disappointment because they never seem to find the 'right' partner, or they keep having relationships with people who end up being the 'wrong one'. Yet, we keep on searching for the 'perfect' partner to complete us, even though we are shown over and over that, no matter how many partners we have, the feeling of completeness and joy we long for, seems to allude us.
I bring this up because this is the time of year that finds many people rushing about, buying hearts, flowers, chocolate and cards to celebrate Valentine's Day, in the hopes that these gifts will capture the love they feel for their partners, or perhaps rekindle the long-lost love they once felt for each other. Single people who have no partner often spend this time depressed by the fact that they don't have a partner, and feel lonely and unhappy as a result. Yet, the antidote to all of this fruitless searching, according to all the great sages and masters of all traditions, is to see clearly that the Love we are seeking in another person can only be found inside us. in fact, WE ARE that Love that we continue to believe is 'out there' in another person. And the really good news is that, all we have to do to know this love that we are is to turn within and dive into it once again.
Usually the disappointment of a few failed relationships is enough to begin to wake us up from the complete delusion that true love can be found in anyone but ourselves. In the aftermath of a failed relationship, when our hearts feel broken and spent, we just may be blessed with the grace to discover that the love we have spent our entire lives longing for in another person, has always been within us. It's simply been waiting for our recognition of it, and to come home to it's healing joy and light once again.
If you doubt this, take a few minutes on Valentines Day (or right now) and get a sense that your very breath is Love itself, and breathe this love through an opening in the middle of your chest, right into the space of your own heart. Feel it! Breathe this Love out through that opening to all your loved one's, especially that someone who may be your romantic partner. Get a sense that you already contain, and are, the ocean of love. It's not a matter of 'loving youself'', it's a recognition that, who you are is Love itself. One thing is for sure; until you know this truth for yourself, you will continue the futile search for someone 'out there' to fulfill you, and while you may find someone who temporarily seems to do the trick, in the end they will simply disappoint you, as so many other potential lovers have. The only way to truly find the love that we long for is to recognize that we are Love itself - that Love is ALL and Love is EVERYONE, including YOU.